A Letter from Ricky
My name is Ricky, and I live at Sponsors Roosevelt Crossing Campus. I have a part-time job in facilities maintenance. My home and income are small, but I finally feel safe, which has helped me continue to make changes and plan for my future.
Recently, I was diagnosed with PTSD. This was hard news to learn, but I am taking it one day at a time and figuring out how to keep moving forward. A home has been rare in my life, and I am grateful to have one after releasing from prison and completing Sponsors Transitional Housing Program. There are just a few longer-term units here at Roosevelt Crossing, and I am thankful I got to move into one. As you may know, our local housing market makes finding a home tough for someone like me.
I have embraced honesty as a critical part of my recovery; I will tell you – this is not my first 2nd chance. I was released to Sponsors twice before, but wasn’t ready. I couldn’t allow myself to utilize the help offered. I still believed that showing emotions, crying, or accepting help was a sign of weakness. The violence I had witnessed in my life taught me that I had to be tough to survive, which put me on a path of bad choices and serious consequences.
The truth is, I have made many bad choices in my life. I would get on a good path, but then a mistake would send me back to my life of crime. Again, and again, I was back where I had started. It was a painful cycle, and I feared how it would end.
When I came to Sponsors this year, I didn’t think it could be different. Why would anyone believe I could change? How could I believe in myself? I have been discounted most of my life, cycling in and out of prisons and jail cells. But I was tired of my life and of being afraid. Prison is scary; I always looked over my shoulder and watched my back. The fear of violence is a shared experience by most people who have been incarcerated.
But to my surprise, the staff here at Sponsors treated me with dignity and provided a safe community. I believed my life could change for the better. This belief helped me to embrace the help provided. I started engaging in my group classes; they were a real game-changer. Specifically, the Thinking for a Change class helped me understand what led to many of my bad choices. I also began working with my counselor, and a Peer Wellness Specialist. My counselor was the one who diagnosed me with PTSD. Learning this made me worried for my future, but he reassured me he was here for me. And with time, I finally began healing.
I am thankful that Sponsors has been willing to accept me as I am today. After years of struggling, I am on a path towards stability. I am working to repair relationships with my ex-wife and my adult son, and I feel hopeful for a future free from violence. Without the safety and support of Sponsors, I know I wouldn’t be here today.